Real Men Don't Apologize

by
Jim Belushi

Hyperion, May 2005, 272 pp.
ISBN: 1-4013-0182-7

Genre: Non-Fiction
Subgenre: Autobiography / Guy's Guide to Life
Reviewed: 9/28/2006

Reviewed by: Conan Tigard

Book Cover

Excerpt

Self-honesty

I know what you're saying. "What in the blue hell does 'self-honesty' mean?" Admitting you have a small Johnson? No. It's much more serious. At least in my life, this is the most important term of them all. Be honest with yourself about who you are. And then never, ever apologize to anyone for being that man.

Real men don't apologize for being who they are.

People say they are sorry far too often for things they are not truly sorry about. "Sorry I'm late. I got caught in traffic." You're not sorry you're late! You're pissed off you're late! It's okay to be pissed off. Don't apologize for that. "I'm sorry I offended you when I said you were being a nag." No, you're not! You're damn glad you finally had the balls to tell someone to get off your damn back! "I'm sorry I farted." No, you aren't. You only wish it had lasted longer and more people got to smell it. Stufffy people.

"Sorry" is a lie. Unless, of course, you did something malicious that you felt badly about later. But otherwise it's such a manipulative word. You are tying to ingratiate yourself to  others by saying "sorry," instead of being proud of who you are. But never say you're sorry for being who you are. Be proud of who you are, damn it! And if someone can't deal with the person you are, it's time to find someone else to hang out with. As long as you are honest with yourself and those around you, they have no right to make you apologize for being yourself.

"Never say anything about anybody that you wouldn't say to their face." That's more than just a sentence with a host of grammatical agreement problems. That's the simple rule I follow to make sure I'm maintaining self-honesty, integrity and loyalty.

Synopsis

How can you become a real man? Most of us out there are men, but do we always stand up for ourselves and make the right decisions? Do we pick the right girl to spend out life with? Or do we just roll along, letting woman strip away our masculinity until we are nothing but the "yes" men that they want us to be.

Jim Belushi has been though situations like this and has made the changes that have finally led him to a happy marriage with the right woman. Jim breaks the novel up into three books: 1) How to be a Man, According to Jim, 2) Dating, According to Jim, and3) The Book of Love, According to Jim (notice how he sneaks in the plug for his ABC television sitcom.) Each book is made up of 5 chapters that cover everything from the death of his brother, John, to finally marriage.

Real Men Don't Lie is a non-fiction book written by Jim Belushi. The intent of the book is to help men become "real" men through advice.

Review

From the first chapter, I had a very hard time putting this book down. I don't read a lot of non-fiction, but was quite pleased to find that I loved this book. Men will highly enjoy both the humor and the truth in these pages. Now, if you are a woman, this book could also be interesting to you as it will let you in on the way men think.

Although I didn't agree 100 percent with Jim Belushi on every word in the book, I did agree with him most of the time. Will I take a lot of what I learned in the book and apply it to my life? Damn straight I will.

Even though we learn best from our own mistakes, it is always helpful, and less painful, to learn from another's. Jim has made a lot of mistakes in his life . . . but haven't we all.

So, if you are looking for some advice on being a man, getting the woman you want, losing the wrong woman that you have, and living a happy life, Real Men Don't Lie by Jim Belushi is the best book around. Plus, you will find yourself laughing out loud at Jim's audacious writing style.

Way to go Jim, this is quite a book and should be on every man's book shelf.

I rated this book a 9½ out of 10.